Getting back on track

As many who have read my blog know there was supposed to be a wedding on St Patrick's Day, my son was going to get married. Many things went wrong during the past few weeks and there was no wedding. However, my hotel was already booked and paid for, so I went anyway. A good friend of mine and I went to Vegas on a shoestring budget and stayed at the Luxor for 4 days and 3 nights.

While Vegas is a fun place to be, when you are like me and cannot afford to gamble, it was a horrible time. I was worried about my son, my upcoming move, my classes I was missing, and how do I make it from here. I put on a happy face and really tried to be fun and this is awesome, but inside I was miserable.

My son compounded that misery, when he phoned me Thursday morning needing money wired to him right away. It seems the calmness that he portrayed the few days prior came to a halt, when his girlfriend went after him with a butcher knife on Wednesday and stabbed him in the arm. He is ok, but now she is in jail. They filed charges against her assault with a deadly weapon. My son did not press charges, but the state did. He loves her even though she has a mental illness. He says she is still in there and needs helps to get back to reality.

So now he is broke, no car, Texas motel, and a girlfriend in jail. They managed to pay rent on the motel until the end of the month. Sold the car they had and bought a cheaper one, and got cash back to pay the motel and should have got food; but she went manic and took off in the car and spent all the left over cash on a ring. So on her return to the motel all hell broke loose, and ultimately ended with her stabbing my son. Off to jail she goes with the car keys around her neck. Since he is not on the title, they will not release the keys to him and she won't release them because she thinks he is going to drive off and leave her in Texas.

I had a terrible hang-over from overindulging on St Patrick's day at the Casino. I am a light weight when it comes to drinking, so it didn't take much for me to have a horrible hangover. He calls me and I need to find an ATM and a Western Union in Vegas at 8 in the morning. My friend is telling my no don't do it, you are just enabling him. He has to learn a lesson, what will happen if you don't send him money, and on and on and on.

Sure I would love to say no. And probably should say no, but he is my son and he is in a strange city with a crazy girlfriend, who tried to kill him. And he was sober. I just went and sent the money. I listened to her lecture me, and sent the money. I listened to her try and control my thoughts about my children and dismissed them. Needless to say, the rest of our visit to Vegas was not so pleasant.

I had Internet at the hotel and attempted to do my class work and tried to go to seminar, but the connection was so bad and kept dropping me that it made it impossible to attend. Vegas is no place to try and go to school. So I opted to do the option 2, and just try and have some fun. This was Wednesday, of course, before the horrors of Thursday hit home, hard.

I did explain, but I sincerely doubt he heard me, that if he used any of this money for booze, I would no longer speak with him. Just consider me dead to him. I was done. Yes, I have been done before and he always sucks me in. But I simply do not have the cash to send him to bail him out of problems. He gets SSI, and the one hundred bucks I sent him will tide him over until his SSI check comes. And he did get a change of address in time. But I am cash poor these days and am having to move out of my home and move in with a friend because I can't make it any any longer.

So the reality is this, son is sober living in Texas, his girlfriend in jail with assault charges, and me trying to finish school so I can get a job and get on with my life. But one great thing, my daughter and family are here from California to help me transition over to my friend's house and get my stuff into storage.

This is my story, why I missed unit 7 seminar.