Monday, March 8, 2010
Missing
I am very worried, cannot get hold of my son. I am so worried. He is very unstable. He has not answered my calls or texts. I know he didn't before but then I suspected he was drinking but now I know he is. When he drinks he sinks further into a depression. I am afraid. He lives in Colorado and I am in Arizona. It isn't like I can just go see if he is OK. I don't know anyone in the little mountain he lives in to go check on him. His girlfriend is in the hospital, so no one is there to check on him. When he stops drinking, he may have a seizure. Alone, there is no one to help him; he can aspirate. It has happened before and put him in the hospital for months. My mind says he is just ignoring my call because he is drinking and he knows I know his voice and can tell. He can't hide it from me even though he attempts to lie and tell me he isn't drinking. But my heart knows something is wrong. I will wait one more day and send the police to check on him. I don't know what else to do. They have friends, though I don't know them, but maybe someone will stop by. One thing I hear years ago that an alcoholic hold all who love them hostage. Alcoholism is not just a single individual disease, it is a family disease. I hope he is alright, I hope I can sleep.
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Peggy, I know exactly where you are coming from. Although, my older son did not choose alcohol, he chose drugs. At age 17 I had to ask him to leave my home because of his drug use. I had a younger child at home and could not have him exposed to the damage that my older son was doing to himself and the family. Every time the phone rang, I jumped because I was afraid it would be the police or the morgue! There was nothing I could do for him until he realized himself that he needed help. I cried myself to sleep countless nights. When he was 19, he called me and asked me to help him. I had him come home and sat down with him and laid out some ground rules. He had to go to rehab. He had to finish rehab. He had to go to a halfway house to live for at least 3 months, then he could come home. Once he got home he had to get a job and either work full time or work part time and go to school (college). He chose to work part time and go back to school. He got into ITT Tech and studied computer electronics. He graduated 3rd in his class with honors. He is employed and very happy now. He has fallen off the wagon twice in the past 12 years, but only for a nights binge each time. The last fall was about 4 years ago. I completely supported him while he was going through his recovery. I went to visit him every week while he was in rehab and even went to classes to learn about addiction. The classes were very interesting and made sense, but I still have a hard time understanding how someone can let drugs or alcohol take over their lives. It was a rough patch of life, going through all that, but I'm so glad that it is over and he is doing well. When he had his couple of slips, he called me to talk about it. I was pleased that he did that and also relieved that he didn't fall farther than just a little bump. He and his fiance came to visit me in TN the first week of Jan. 2010. I was so happy to see him. And......although my younger son is the baby, my older son is my baby.
ReplyDeleteHearing success stories give me hope.
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